Heaven has a new Angel

Baby Layne Grace Gaston earned her angel wings this morning.  Please pray for Kris, Hamp, & their family in the next days, months, years.  Childen are a gift from God and He has called her home to be with Him, she longer feels pain and suffering - SHE IS HEALED! 
Praise you Heavenly Father for Your love and grace.

By day the LORD directs His love,at night His song is with me - a prayer to the God of my life.

Psalm 42:8

Happy Birthday, Aiden!

Dear Aiden,

Today 1 year ago you were born into this world and it was the happiest day of our lives.  I remember laying in the operating room scared not because of the c-section but of not meeting and holding you.  They whisked you away before I was able to see you and you never made a sound.  I've heard stories of when they showed you to your big brothers that Hunter tried to follow when they took you to NICU.  Both Hunter and Mason love you dearly and pray for you to be happy and healthy in Heaven, which I know you are. 

There are so many things I want to tell you and so many things I know we should be doing.  I held a little boy that was born the day before you and Hunter & Mason were standing beside me and all I could think was this is how it should be. . .
                           my 3 little boys in my arms.

If you were here, you would be walking everywhere, you would be sitting on the floor rolling the ball back and forth with your brothers, you would be trying to get in the kitchen cabinets and would find the one unlocked cabinet that you can play in, you would try coloring with your brothers but would realized eating it is more fun, you would love cuddling at night while Hunter reads his books for school, you would be eating "real" food and loving Cheetos and orange fingers, and you would have worn your first of many Halloween costumes and gone on our neighborhood hayride, you would be getting ready for your 2nd Christmas, YOU WOULD BE HERE.

The days of crying have slowed but have not stopped and never will.  I'm not sure of who I am but I'm sure of who I need to be - a child of Christ.  God's love keeps me going and knowing that there are no goodbye's but I will hold you again.  Heaven became a better place the day you arrived.

We miss you so much but are so happy that you are not suffering and you are healed by God's Grace and Neverending Love.  Thank you Dear Lord for giving us the time we had and giving us the Faith to know we will be together again. 

HAPPY 1ST BIRTHDAY, AIDEN! 

The LORD will work out His plans for my life--for Your faithful love, O LORD, endures forever. Don't abandon me, for You made me.

Psalm 138:8

Pumpkin Patch

Last weekend, Shane, the boys, and I loaded up after church and went to Brandon, MS to the pumpkin patch.  Yes there are pumpkin patches that are closer but I had an ulterior motive, I wanted to see Layne, and get to hold that sweet little angel, which I did!!

The boys add more fun playing once they picked out pumpkins.  I will add more pictures of the pumpkin carving and Halloween. 

Layne Grace Gaston - Caring Bridge

I have several that have e-mailed asking how Baby Layne is doing as well as her family.  They have created a page on Caring Bridge to keep everyone updated, please click on the link below.

http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/laynegracegaston

I'm so excited, we are going to the hospital tonight to see Kris & Hamp and Baby Layne.  Please continue to keep this special family in your prayers - that God gives them wisdom and peace in the decisions they make for Layne.

Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.

Hebrews 11:1

Baby Layne Grace Gaston

Yesterday, Thursday October 14, I had the joy of meeting Kristina face to face and sharing in the joy of meeting Baby Layne Grace Gaston

Until yesterday, Kris and I have only talked by email, text, and FB, so I was so excited that I could be there to share this special day with her.  Layne Grace was born at 1:00 pm yesterday and is doing good and breathing on her own.  She weighed 4 lbs 1 oz and 16 1/2 inches long compared to Aiden she looked big to me.  It was such a blessing and a testement of God's love to us. 

I received a text earlier today that Kris was able to hold Layne Grace last night and I know she had tears of joy.  It was such a great day of love, faith, family and friends. 

I also met Julie another Trisomy 18 mom, her daughter Magdalina lived a miraculous 167 days and went to Heaven January 13, 2009.  I feel such a connection with these ladies and even though I would love to have Aiden with me and not have this connection, God has brought us together to help each other.  He does have a plan in our lives and I am so Thankful! 

Please continue to pray for Kris, Hamp, and their other children that God gives them strength, love, and healing.  Pray for Layne Grace that God continues to hold her in His arms and keeps her from pain. 

Peace I leave with you, My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you.  Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.

John 14:27

Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day

I really was unsure about posting this after the wonderful and miraculous day I had yesterday (will post later today).  But I could not let this day go without remembering. 

Today - October 15th - is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day.

For those that have experienced this loss, it's not just today but everyday.  Our little angel babies are always on our minds, in our hearts, and not in our arms. 

But this is a day to celebrate all babies that are in Heaven - some that were only "known" as a heartbeat on the ultrasound, some that were felt in the womb, some that took a breath and all that touched our lives. 

Please pray for the parents that have lost babies and those that will.  God knows you before you are conceived and His plans for you are great and wonderful. 

Father, I have experienced deep emotional wounds.  But I ask You to deliver me out of all of these.  Heal me and cause me to grow from these wounds

Psalm 34:19



Prayer Request

Kristina, a dear friend, found out at 28 weeks that her baby girl, Layne, has Trisomy 18.  She is scheduled to have a c-section on Thursday, Oct. 14, please pray for Peace and Guidance for her and her family.  I feel a very close connection with Kristina even though we have yet to meet. 

Unrealized Miracles

This may not be the correct term but to me it is.  I have recently been emailing with someone whose 3rd baby has been diagnosed with Trisomy 18 and while talking with her I have started remembering moments with Aiden.  I have posted before about not remembering things/moments/details about the time we had with Aiden.  I truly wanted all that time burned in my memory but for reasons unknown I can't remember a lot, not just a few minutes/hours here and there, I mean days and people and details I should.  I had finally decided it was God telling me I would remember when I needed to, well through talking with a new found friend, I have started remembering things.  I have realized that some of the memories I have been having are miracles that at the time I didn't realize what they were - God truly has a plan.
When my boss' daughter, Ginny, found out that were 1st child Eliot was diagnosed with T18 it was devastating to everyone but they continued to seek God.  I being the internet junkie researched and read everything about T18, little did I know what this knowledge had in store for me.  This remarkable little boy lived for 99 days and brought so many people closer to God and knowing his family and seeing them turn to God not away brought so many so much Hope, so much Life, so much closer to God.  I found out during that time that I was pregnant with our 2nd son (who is a healthy, happy, bursting with energy 3 year old now)and I could never imagine what I would do and how I would feel knowing that my child would not survive. 
3 years later and I was in her shoes, when at 18 weeks going to have an ultrasound to find out if our 3rd child was a boy or girl, we are told there is something wrong.  Luckily for us, the high risk pregnancy dr would be in town the next day and could do the Amnio and Level II ultrasound to determine what was going on, otherwise it would be 2 - 4 weeks before he would be back.  The tests were done the day we were leaving on vacation.  I know crazy that I would think it was a miracle to go on vacation after the tests but at least I did not have to be waiting at home or work for the results.  I could be away with my family and watching my boys play.  My doctor suggested getting a doppler to be able to hear the heartbeat to give me peace of mind - miracle of technology that I could hear Aiden's heartbeat.
The day of the c-section, the Nurse Practitioner assigned to us happened to be my best friend from high school, we had not really kept in touch but I was so glad she was there.  Having her watch over Aiden and help decipher doctor talk and to know what I needed was definitely an answered prayer.
Looking at pictures of Aiden's birth, I realized that one of the NICU nurses that I came to admire and truly call a friend was also at his birth.  She was there from day one, she cried with us, prayed with us, and loved our little fighter.  We were given so many great nurses that I love and admire - their job is the hardest and most rewarding.  They allowed us to take our sons back to meet their brother.

I found this definition of
Miracle - An event that appears inexplicable by the laws of nature and so is held to be supernatural in origin or an act of God: "Miracles are spontaneous, they cannot be summoned, but come of themselves" (Katherine Anne Porter).

I believe these memories and many more that I have yet to recall were our little miracles surround our greatest miracle - Aiden. 

He hath made His wonderful works to be remembered: the LORD is gracious and full of compassion.

Psalm 111:4

1st day of school

Hunter started 1st grade last week and is so excited.  He wouldn't let me take too many pictures so I only have a few.

Look at that loaded backpack, he took all his supplies on the first day, he said I'm about to fall over.

Last year, I would walk him into class everyday and he didn't even mind giving me a kiss or hug but not this year, he told me on the very first day that he wanted daddy to take him, insert sniffing here!  And the next day, I was only allowed to drop him off at the doors and he could not kiss me anymore at school because his friends might see, more sniffing here.  My sweet, little, adorable baby is growing up and I DON'T LIKE IT!!!!  He comes home in the afternoons and tries to convince me or as he phrases it "cut him some slack" and let him do his homework later.  Where do they come up with this stuff???

But he does love his teacher (he better she lives down the street) and is doing very well on his work, so I really cannot complain. 

Hope everyone has a great school year!

My son, keep your father’s commandment, and forsake not your mother’s teaching.

Proverbs 6:20

Happy Anniversary!!

Today, hubby and I celebrate our 10th Anniversary married, we have been together a total of 15 years.  Yes we dated for 5 years before getting married - he tells everyone that he was waiting for me to graduate college and I kept dragging it out! HA. 
We woke up telling each other Happy Anniversary and he said we lasted 8 years longer than he thought - I really think he was joking, he better have been joking, and if not he better not tell me.  He always says when he stops picking on me that means he doesn't love me anymore - so I say Let the picking continue!!!
10 years married, 3 states, 3 apartments/condos, 2 houses, 3 boys, and I still love him even after all this time.  He is my best friend, my lover, father of my children, and my life.  I love you very much!!!!

HAPPY ANNIVERSARY, SHANE!

(Could not find a pic of the two of us I liked but I will find out and post it)

Just Ducky

Maybe I love throwing parties - any kind of parties, maybe I love kids' clothes, maybe I'm just nuts.  For the last couple of years, I have hosted a Home Show for a friend at my house but this year she decided to give it up and asked if I wanted to take it over.  I have thought about it in the past but it was a thought but now I'm actually doing it. 

For those who don't know what a Home Show is, well, it's kind of like the old Tupperware parties, where you invite friends over to see and purchase items.  During college I worked at Paul Harris (juniors/misses/ladies clothing store - now closed - but not my fault!) and I loved it, it was so much fun putting outfits together and helping customers pick out for themselves or others.  

I am considered an Area Consultant for Just Ducky Originals

The clothes are SSSSSSSSOOOOO cute and can be customized at a Home Show by changing fabrics, adding appliques, initials/monograms, etc.  You can also buy online HERE.  

My shows start Friday and go through Sunday and I can't wait.  I will try to post a few pics next week. 

I Have Awards

1st Award

Thank you Tracey at Tales of Baby Jack Reese for bestowing this great honor on me.  Love reading your blog even if it does have orange and blue all over it - HA! 

Pass the award along to 10 worthy bloggers.


1. Kim, My Life Through Pink Colored Glasses
2. I Do Declare
3. Jhona, We Weirdos Need to Stick Together
4. Rhianna Claire
5. Surviving Little People
6. Sweet Tea & Biscuits
7. Jackson's Lane
8. Southern Comfort
9. Hottie Mamas
10. Cori Lynn, Life with the Beach's



The award comes with questions you need to answer when you pay it forward. Here are your questions:


1. What is your favorite thing about summer?
Family vacations especially at the beach.  New favorite thing is BASEBALL.

2. What is your favorite color?
Red

3. What is your favorite part of blogging?
Making new friends and getting great advice/tips on parenting, decorating, and cooking (something I don't always do but love thinking about cooking anyway).

4. What is the first thing you do every day?
Shower and get dressed, boys are last to get up.

5. What is the last thing you do every day?
Lock all the doors (hubby doesn't always do it and I'm paranoid).

6. What is your favorite day of the year?
My boys' birthdays (that includes hubby) and mine, of course.  I did say I love presents!

7. What is one free activity you enjoy doing with your family?
Fishing (or at least watching them fish while I worship the sun)

8. What is one thing you can’t live without?
Faith

9. What is your favorite meal?
I have to agree with Tracey with this one, I love sushi.  I could it everyday.

10. What is your favorite children’s book?
These are 2 of my favorite books, a dear friend, Kelly, gave me these books when Aiden was born and I read them to him everynight and still look at them.

2nd Award

I am supposed to name 12 blogs for this award. . The following blogs are ones that I check out every day and they they are always so up beat and happy! But I honestly can't pick out just 12 blogs that I love, SO I'm passing this award on to all my followers.  Thank you so much for reading and following my blog, your words of encouragement have meant so much to me in the last year and I know they will continue.  I hope I can be an encouragement to you.  LOVES!!!!

My New Mascara Love

If you read my blog you remember my post about Dior Iconic Mascara, I LOVE this mascara and truly, whole heartedly, always faithfully recommend it.  With that being said, I ran out of my favorite before I knew it and I don't go anywhere without mascara and since my favorite Sephora is a few hours away - I know I can order online but that takes time too and yes I did that but to get me by until it came in. . .

Yes, I went to the local Wal-Mart and looked and read each label and this one stepped out at me - Maybelline Lash Stiletto Voluptuous (NEW) 

I have fallen head over heals in love.  I have thin eyelashes unlike my hubby and sons who have gorgeous, thick, and long eyelashes.  The crazy wand grabs (no it does not hurt) the eyelash and extends and thickens, I can actually see them and they are gorgeous (sorry I did not take pics but I will - PROMISE!).  And yes it comes in Waterproof which is the only mascara I buy especially since I'm a very emotional person. 

I have not given up my Dior but this will definitely work day to day.

No this is not a paid review, I just wanted to share this new product I found.

July 7, 2010 - So much has changed

yet everything is the same.  A year ago today, our lives changed forever.  You see a year ago today, we were told our sweet little Aiden (who was 18 weeks gestation) might have Trisomy 18.  We were so excited to go to the doctors and find out if we were having a boy or girl and never dreamed of what we would learn.
So many things have changed, we are now a family of 5 (4 in our house and 1 in our heart), we are missing one in our arms everyday.  We are the same because when people see us we are a family of 4 (a very special person they will never meet physically but I pray they meet through us).  Every night when Mason says his prayers he includes "Baby Aiden", that is how he will always be remembered and every night Hunter gives himself a little hug and says that is for "Baby Aiden".  They love him and miss him very much.

This past weekend, I played with a dear friend's baby that was born the day before Aiden.  I love seeing how much he has grown and changed, and knowing that is my little baby in heaven - laughing, smiling, happy, and healthy. 

I started writing Thank You notes last night, I realize it has been 7 months tomorrow since my sweet Aiden went to Heaven but I could not bring myself to do it.  But I wanted to, I needed to, I want everyone to know that everything they did, everything they gave, and everything they said meant very much to me and we have not forgotten.  We had and have so many amazing friends that gave selflessly of themselves and want them to know we LOVE them for that. 

Lately I have had memories of those special days that I had not remembered before and the emotions become so fresh again.  It's hard to believe that it has been 7 months since I last held him but other days it has been a lifetime. 

I cannot say our lives are better, they are better having known, held, and loved him but they are worse for not having in our arms daily, our lives are just different.  A very dear friend wrote on her blog today about the loss of her son and not feeling Angry - I agree.  I don't feel agry, what's the point, I feel hurt, sadness, I continue to ask Why? but not anger.  God gave me a precious gift and I will never be angry with Him. 

HELP - DESPERATELY SEEKING ADVICE

Ok you will rarely hear me ask for advice on kitchen stuff because I just don't use the gadgets that much.  Don't get me wrong I love the way they look in a kitchen and make everyone think I am an AWESOME cook, but I'm not.   I can cook just don't take the time.

But I am desperately seeking advice - my blender (MY FAVORITE APPLIANCE) broke, burnt the motor, in the trash, gone to me forever, so now I'm looking for a new one.  I started thinking about everything that I use a blender for and it has nothing to do with cooking - IT'S ALL ABOUT THE DRINKS!!!  Not just the great and fabulous adult beverages (Frozen Daiquiris, Margaritas, Pina Colados, Bellini Cocktails, Bananas Foster, Mudslide, Bailey's Shake, Rum Runner, oh I could go on) but we make the kiddie versions too (boys love Colados, Daiquiris, and Smoothies - NO ALCOHOL, of course!). 

These all look really cool and sleek and would do the job. 

BUT . . .

Since I realized I don't use them for much except crushing ice and making drinks, I REALLY WANT ONE OF THESE - MARGARITAVILLE CONCOCTION MAKER.  Birthday and anniversary are coming up if hubby and/or dear, sweet, loving friends are reading - PLEASE I WILL BE GOOD AND MAKE PLENTY FOR EVERYONE!

So I'm asking - What do you like/dislike about your blenders?  What brand do you use?

My Little All Star

I have never been more proud of my little boy.  Hunter was selected as an Alternate for the All Stars team, he knew from the beginning that meant he would only play if someone was not there.  All Stars is for 7 & 8 year olds and since he was 6 he was just happy that he was picked.  In his eyes, he was part of the team no matter what, he was happy to sit in the bleachers with his uniform on and cheer for his team.  He would yell "Go All Stars", he would cheer each player on at bat - it really amazed me.  He went to all practices, participated in scrimmages, waited each night to see if he would play, but was never disappointed when he didn't, and after each game he would tell his teammates they did a great job!!!

Yesterday, Shane was called and told Hunter would be playing last night, one player could not play.  Hunter was in and he was so excited, he and hubby practiced batting and catching before we left for the big game.  He had his uniform, Dixie Youth Baseball patch sewed on, and he was ready to play.  During the game he was in Outfield, and he stopped/chase/threw 4 balls and I was beaming from ear to ear - "That's my baby!"

BROTHERLY LOVE - nothing better!

We didn't win that game but it was a great night anyway!!

He hath made His wonderful works to be remembered: the LORD is gracious and full of compassion.

Psalm 111:4

Wordless Wednesday