Friday, September 03, 2010

Unrealized Miracles

This may not be the correct term but to me it is.  I have recently been emailing with someone whose 3rd baby has been diagnosed with Trisomy 18 and while talking with her I have started remembering moments with Aiden.  I have posted before about not remembering things/moments/details about the time we had with Aiden.  I truly wanted all that time burned in my memory but for reasons unknown I can't remember a lot, not just a few minutes/hours here and there, I mean days and people and details I should.  I had finally decided it was God telling me I would remember when I needed to, well through talking with a new found friend, I have started remembering things.  I have realized that some of the memories I have been having are miracles that at the time I didn't realize what they were - God truly has a plan.
When my boss' daughter, Ginny, found out that were 1st child Eliot was diagnosed with T18 it was devastating to everyone but they continued to seek God.  I being the internet junkie researched and read everything about T18, little did I know what this knowledge had in store for me.  This remarkable little boy lived for 99 days and brought so many people closer to God and knowing his family and seeing them turn to God not away brought so many so much Hope, so much Life, so much closer to God.  I found out during that time that I was pregnant with our 2nd son (who is a healthy, happy, bursting with energy 3 year old now)and I could never imagine what I would do and how I would feel knowing that my child would not survive. 
3 years later and I was in her shoes, when at 18 weeks going to have an ultrasound to find out if our 3rd child was a boy or girl, we are told there is something wrong.  Luckily for us, the high risk pregnancy dr would be in town the next day and could do the Amnio and Level II ultrasound to determine what was going on, otherwise it would be 2 - 4 weeks before he would be back.  The tests were done the day we were leaving on vacation.  I know crazy that I would think it was a miracle to go on vacation after the tests but at least I did not have to be waiting at home or work for the results.  I could be away with my family and watching my boys play.  My doctor suggested getting a doppler to be able to hear the heartbeat to give me peace of mind - miracle of technology that I could hear Aiden's heartbeat.
The day of the c-section, the Nurse Practitioner assigned to us happened to be my best friend from high school, we had not really kept in touch but I was so glad she was there.  Having her watch over Aiden and help decipher doctor talk and to know what I needed was definitely an answered prayer.
Looking at pictures of Aiden's birth, I realized that one of the NICU nurses that I came to admire and truly call a friend was also at his birth.  She was there from day one, she cried with us, prayed with us, and loved our little fighter.  We were given so many great nurses that I love and admire - their job is the hardest and most rewarding.  They allowed us to take our sons back to meet their brother.

I found this definition of
Miracle - An event that appears inexplicable by the laws of nature and so is held to be supernatural in origin or an act of God: "Miracles are spontaneous, they cannot be summoned, but come of themselves" (Katherine Anne Porter).

I believe these memories and many more that I have yet to recall were our little miracles surround our greatest miracle - Aiden. 

He hath made His wonderful works to be remembered: the LORD is gracious and full of compassion.

Psalm 111:4